you were amazing.

we did amazing things.

deion mottram, go fuck yourself.

"are you still upset with me?"
"yes."
"and why would that be?"
"because i don't like being treated like shit."
"oh and you think you've been treating me like a king? noo, think about me aye. :)"

when i read that text message, my heart started beating so fast. i clenched my fists, i couldn't even think properly and i pegged my phone into a wall. you make my blood boil, you make my head spin, you make me wish i never laid eyes on you. believe me when i say, if i could go back and change something i would change everything. i would have broken up with you when you first hit me, when you tripped me over, i would have broken up with you with you had a bitch about me hugging and hanging out with my friends because after that you went and let your girl friends sit on your lap and play with your hair, i would have broken up with you after the first time you made me cry, i would have fucking done it so long ago. how dare you say i haven't done ANYTHING for you, you'll fucking regret saying that, i promise you. how dare you tell ME to get over MYSELF. how dare you think this is something it's not. you've lied to me, you've broken me, you've destroyed me from the inside, out. you've made me hurt myself, you've made me think that i don't deserve to see the light of day some days, you've made me feel the lowest i have ever. and for that, never again. i texted you about an hour ago saying "i haven't fucking done ANYTHING." i'm still waiting on the reply, you peice of shit. let's see what you've got to say now.

if you think that a kiss is all in the lips, come on, you've got it all wrong man. if you think that the dance is all in hips, oh well, then do the twist. if you think holding hands is all in the fingers, grab hold of the soul where the memory lingers and make sure to never do it with the singer 'cause he'll tell everyone in the world.

i don't trust you, i don't believe you and you will never get the chance to call me yours ever again.

i am so angry and so frustrated with you. i've thought about spending all the money i've saved up over the past two years that i plan on using to see you with, on myself. but i realised that i would feel worse and even further away from you.

i didn't give you chance after chance just so you could turn around and do the same thing. you do little things that hurt me and annoy me, but i can deal with that because i'm starting to give you your own medicine, and now it doesn't bother me to see you hurt because of me. but if you ever hurt like you have again, i'll do exactly what you asked me to. i'll forget about you for awhile. you hurt me, i hurt you. i think that's fair.

why am i mad at you? because you said you would always be here for me and then you fucked off. don't start with the piss weak excuses. "i wanted to give you space, i wasn't sure what you wanted me to do, i didn't want to see you get hurt again." what the fuck? i want someone to throw me down, looking me in the eye and tell me excatly what i mean to them. i wouldn't walk away if you didn't make it so easy to.